Spilling your sexual energy

I put my naked body all over the internet and I rarely ever attract unwanted sexual attention.
When I was younger, I spilled my sexual energy all over the place.
I wore super low-cut tops, showed as much skin as possible, flirted… all with the intention of being more attractive.
Really I was trying to get validation.
I was energetically pulling for the validation of men.
And then I would get offended when men – especially men I didn’t like – dared think of me sexually.
I didn’t know how to hold my sexual energy in my body without dumping it all over.
I remember asking in one of my first sexual energy courses ever: what do I DO with all this energy?
And the teacher was like why do you need to do anything with it? Why can’t you just keep it, hold it for yourself?
I hadn’t considered that before, that my sexual energy could just be for me. It was overwhelming to feel the sensation. I wanted to give and show it to everyone else.
My website has had over 30,000 individual visitors this year. I have maybe received TWO emails to the effect of “do you shave your pussy” or some shit like that.
I do not attract unwanted attention because my boundaries are clean.
They are energetically felt.
Online and in person.
I am continually working on increasing my capacity to hold sensation in my body (@sxbmbpractice is great for this) so that I don’t spill my energy.
Some women have asked me, “How do you share your photos without appearing slutty?”
It’s because I’m in total approval of my sexuality, and I’m not using it to get something from others.
If you are in disapproval of a part of yourself, you will attract the people who mirror that back to you.
There is zero part of me anymore that wonders if people will perceive me this way or that way.
There is no part of me that is trying to pull for attention with my images, these days.
So I don’t receive that.
If you are continually receiving unwanted sexual attention, it is your responsibility to look at the part of you that wants it.
This is a difficult thing to own.
And it’s also where true power comes from.
If you liked this piece, you might also enjoy:
– Why I put my naked body on the internet
– This is how to feel safe embodying your feminine energy
– Making fun of each other is criticism, and criticism is not love
– 5 surprising things that can hold you back from getting what you want
– You can get wet every single time you have sex