Spilling your sexual energy

I put my naked body all over the internet and I rarely ever attract unwanted sexual attention. ⁣

When I was younger, I spilled my sexual energy all over the place. ⁣

I wore super low-cut tops, showed as much skin as possible, flirted… all with the intention of being more attractive.⁣

Really I was trying to get validation. ⁣

I was energetically pulling for the validation of men. ⁣

And then I would get offended when men – especially men I didn’t like – dared think of me sexually. ⁣

I didn’t know how to hold my sexual energy in my body without dumping it all over. ⁣

I remember asking in one of my first sexual energy courses ever: what do I DO with all this energy? ⁣

And the teacher was like why do you need to do anything with it? Why can’t you just keep it, hold it for yourself?⁣

I hadn’t considered that before, that my sexual energy could just be for me. It was overwhelming to feel the sensation. I wanted to give and show it to everyone else. ⁣

My website has had over 30,000 individual visitors this year. I have maybe received TWO emails to the effect of “do you shave your pussy” or some shit like that. ⁣

I do not attract unwanted attention because my boundaries are clean. ⁣

They are energetically felt. ⁣

Online and in person. ⁣

I am continually working on increasing my capacity to hold sensation in my body (@sxbmbpractice is great for this) so that I don’t spill my energy. ⁣

Some women have asked me, “How do you share your photos without appearing slutty?” ⁣

It’s because I’m in total approval of my sexuality, and I’m not using it to get something from others. ⁣

If you are in disapproval of a part of yourself, you will attract the people who mirror that back to you. ⁣

There is zero part of me anymore that wonders if people will perceive me this way or that way. ⁣

There is no part of me that is trying to pull for attention with my images, these days. ⁣

So I don’t receive that. ⁣

If you are continually receiving unwanted sexual attention, it is your responsibility to look at the part of you that wants it. ⁣

This is a difficult thing to own. ⁣

And it’s also where true power comes from.


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