Put me with the dead things

Rest came for me this evening
It did not warn me
It did not even knock on the door.
It did not give me time to plan, to let anyone
know in advance
It simply pulled me down with it
To meet it on its level
And it commanded, Stay
And I protested
I said what about my things
What about momentum
What about the things that must get done
And Rest said, do you think you know better
than the natural state of things?
And I kicked and whined and moaned
But I listened
I found my womb
Throbbing with the pulse of life
In charge, in full force at being listened to,
for once
And my heart said, but people! And my mind
said, but writing! And my womb said, No
And she seemed very adamant
So certain that I was even terrified of her
So certain that I listened
And I did Nothing
Even while my mind groaned, we already did
nothing last year. We already had a winter
Now we are supposed to have an
everlasting summer
And my womb said no
There is something you are missing, here
Something you have been ignoring
Something you are not paying enough
attention to
And I will cause chaos until you listen
So we can fight, and I will win
Or you can listen now
So I listened
And my womb told me some secrets
She said you know things
You are afraid to admit you know
You have things to say
You are afraid to say them
Stop running from yourself
Let the earth move through you
And I felt like I was dying
Parts of me shrieking on their way out
And I rested
Oh, I rested.
He said I’m here now
My womb only listened to him
I could only feel my womb
Put me with the dead things
Where leaves whisper
Where the air pulls at my clothing
Where a decapitated stump is
Like a tomb into the earth
I want to know the real things
How quiet I can become if
I am enclosed in branches
As I sit on the stump I can feel my pussy
opening. Without a reason, without
question. My cervix, connecting to the portal
into earth.
I ask: what am I doing here?
It says: you are meant to be a portal
How do I learn
We will teach you
They say, and all branches bow to me at
once
As I approach the land, it says
Turn off your music
So I do. I wrap my headphones around, and I
listen
Come back every day, they say
Every day?
They nod
I thought I’d go my whole life without really
having to admit that I speak to trees
They speak to me
I don’t know, they just always have
They’d speak to you too, if you knew how to
listen
My womb is happy
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