I used to be silent during sex
I used to be silent during sex.
For years, I didn’t make a sound, because I was stuck inside my head.
Was I doing everything right? How did my body look? Was I bad at sex?
It felt unnatural to make any noise, so I didn’t. I figured everyone who was making noise was performing.
When I did start making sounds, they were little – short, appropriate moans that sounded like what I heard in porn.
I was still performing, but I thought that’s what everybody did.
Believing this is a fucking disservice, because sounding is one of the biggest tools to liberate stuck emotion and increase pleasure in our bodies.
It wasn’t until I became fully connected to my body and felt fully *in* my body during sex that making sounds felt natural.
And it doesn’t sound like little moans.
The sounds that come out of my body when experiencing pleasure include moans, loud screams, angry growls, fits of laughter, wails of grief… and more.
I often cycle through all of these things in the span of minutes.
Try expressing sound from the felt sensation your body is physically feeling.
If that piece of you could make a sound, and you weren’t altering or controlling it.. what would it sound like?
This is your birthright, your wildness. The expression of your pleasure that doesn’t look cookie-cutter perfect.
Sex can be the deepest portal for healing. With ourselves or with a partner.
Let yourself make noise
If you liked this piece, you might also enjoy:
– How to have super long orgasms (and what they actually sound like)
– Pleasure is your birthright & this is why it matters
– How to stop thinking about your body during sex
– 8 ways to increase your desire for sex
– Creating safety during sex: the moment of disconnect & the importance of the pause